Courage to Create, Writer's Blog Response

Note to reader, this is an email that I wrote to my mum, about an blog entry for writer’s called “Courage to Create” one of the top 2011 blogs for writers. Olin Mareselas wrote about a hard year and having to get “wise fast” due to life circumstances bombdardment. Well I feel you, and trying to make sense of it does not really work, its more of a feel it all, be in it all, embrace it all, and release the grip of totally trying to make sense of X,Y,Z. And BE. But then you know what the events of life as of lately have revealed truths, and realities, and reasons slowly and starting to form a clearer picture of the art that is called my life. The note below I think is the reason and explanation for the craziness as of lately. —xojk
Mom- I really liked the honesty and the writing and the message! I was just reading as well in a simple book called Prayer for Pilgrims 1980 book about a doctor who writes about prayer- She writes that God molds us like a potter molds clay on a potter’s wheel, when the mold does not come out quite right the potter has to “refashion” the clay again, I can just see how the clay gets pushed back down into wheel into a blob abd reformed again. This feels like where I am @ again, and hence the frustration, but I am being reformed, or “refashioned” and need to trust. What goes on in my mind is “there is something wrong here” and I panic, call Amelia, think I can get understanding she doesn’t help because it didn’t fit her “refashioning” pattern. I guess I have picked a lot of people’s brains lately but realize my strength and success will be my Indepenpende like my goddess card I drew. Looking for too many answers outside myself and not even knowing there is a “refashioning” by god for the vessel he is requiring is taking place, which by the way happens when there is a surrender, which I have continually prayed “To Will to Will Thy Will”.I liked the stepes the writer took, but he did not mention where the money came from to live, as well as his housing situation, the two biggies that I am facing these days, It appeared he had some roots and then worked on the spiritual connection 7th chakra, Body will power 3rd chakra, organinzing his thoughts 6 chakra. Just noticing that I seem to work on the above but it feels like it doesn’t take hold unless those roots are honored as well. Which I have been working on with the Yoga, girlfriend and family time, reconnecting in Utah, and hoping it falls into place somehow through daily inspired action.I drew another goddess card two days in a row. Mother Mary, the message with this card is expect a miracle. I kind of want to speculate the kind of miracle possible but really, when dealing with the divine the fullfilled dream is usually beyond my comprehension. Love Jenn and Hilo girl.

See more progress on: be the instigator